The Caterpillar Grows Wings In A Season of Isolation

The Caterpillar Grows Wings In A Season of Isolation

*Old blog post from July 2020.

My friend sent me the above text recently. It really sums up the transition I have had to make in such a short space of time. And I am not alone. In my last blog we were all facing strange and worrying times as lockdown happened and the world went into turmoil. We each have had to adapt often in more ways than one.

In March I suffered what was thought to be a stroke. It happened again a few more times each month and after many tests I was told it was some kind of neurological issue. Come June, it was happening daily, and the symptoms were debilitating - expressive aphasia (the ability to understand but not speak), one sided weakness which gave varying degrees of limited mobility, chronic fatigue and tiredness, muscle jerks and the scariest of them all, full body paralysis. Unfortunately it affects only my right hand side, although I’m thankfully pretty ambidextrous, it makes painting particularly hard on a flare up. My lovely friend Nadia challenged me to paint a sunflower with my left hand... Lets just say more practice is needed!

I reluctantly gave up my physically demanding day job working in a farm, pet and equestrian feed store as not only has this condition taken its toll on me physically, it’s also been hard mentally.

But, now with plenty time on my hands these past few months, I’ve redirected my attention and focus, and thrown myself into my art and building my website when I have been able to. I am lucky to have this opportunity to continue doing something I love, keeping me distracted while I take some time to heal. I may not be as prolific in my painting as I have been in the past, but I’m grabbing the good days with (thankfully!) both hands!

So much like a caterpillar, not doing much except stuffing my face with the nearest morsels I can lay my hands on, it’s finally time to set myself free. There may be hurdles but we must all learn to use our wings!

“But what if I fall?”

“Oh, but my Darling, what if you fly?”

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